The key to value and worth is who we are in Jesus. When we know that there is nothing for us to do but stand in awe of the Lord and give Him thanks and praise for what He has done for us in Christ. Like the poor widow in 2 Kings 4:1-7 our first step to fullness is to recognize we are empty. We can do noting without God Allow yourself to be filled by His Spirit.
Ps. If we are full of ourselves there is not much space for God work in our lives. Phil 1:6 “I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and
see something totally different.” We don’t know who wrote that statement but it sure is true—especially when it comes to the different ways that men and women perceive so many things! Ladies, I (Cindy) came across an article I think all of us as wives could really benefit from reading and applying. It was written by a man, Dr Val Farmer, who gave several points of advice that “men frequently mention when it comes to describing what they would like in a marriage.” It was published in The Pilot— Independent and is titled, “What Do Men Really Want in Marriage.” It’s my prayer that you’ll read it with an open heart and mind to see what you could learn from it concerning your husband. It could be invaluable to every one of us as wives if we’ll take it to heart. When I showed it to Steve and asked what he thought, he said he wished all wives could read it because it could transform countless marriages if wives would apply its principles. Ladies, I urge you to read what Dr. Farmer has to say and pray about it. Ask God to reveal to you anything that you could learn that could help you. Even though it wasn’t written from a Christian perspective, I saw so many Biblical applications. See if you agree. Dr. Farmer wrote: • Be less critical. Men feel they’re often on the defensive and “wrong” just for voicing an opinion that doesn’t match their wives’ expectations and standards. They want a feeling of teamwork, cooperation, and a more legitimate discussion of issues in their marriage. • Accept him for what he is — imperfect. He needs to be accepted as he is with his own legitimate interests and hobbies. Take advantage of his strengths and good points. Men want appreciation, probably for the things they are doing for the family. Reinforce and reward the things you appreciate him doing. • Don’t make every issue between you a fight to the death. Some quirks and differences you can live with. Trying to change him adds to his and your frustration and resentment. • The home should be a refuge, not a place where he faces a barrage of criticism and conflict. How strongly and frequently you are judgmental of him may shut him down or trigger an emotional response that exacerbates the problem. • Forget the past. Husbands feel that some past hurts and blunders in the marriage aren’t left alone. They feel matters they think are resolved are brought up unfairly in fights. “Let the dead stay buried.” Forgive mistakes. Don’t bear grudges. Don’t bring up the past unless it pertains to a current problem. • Be supportive of work and leisure activities. Men want their wives to understand that work obligations occasionally take precedence over family needs. Some of their priorities are out of their control. “A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do.” Men would like understanding and appreciation for the work pressures and responsibilities they face. A man’s work accomplishments and struggles need to be recognized and supported. • They also want acceptance for their occasional need to be alone or to pursue their personal interests. • Be nurturing. Giving emotional support, respect, attention, soothing and meeting his needs makes coming home special. Family meals together give more than bodily nourishment. In homes where there is confusion, disorganization, anger or emotional distance, men don’t do well. The family doesn’t do well. When women reject or struggle with the homemaking role, there may be a basic discontent that eats away at the marital relationship. These traditionally female responsibilities are important despite everything else that is going on in life. This isn’t a rehashing of stone-age advice on how to please a husband —”shut up and wait on them.” Mutual roles need to be clarified, understood and negotiated. If you are working outside of the home, this is a two-way street. He has a supportive role to play also. But the nurturing and caring still needs to take place. What we are talking about is caring, not care-taking. In the era of women’s greater involvement outside of the home, the baby shouldn’t be thrown out with the bath water. • Verbalize needs. Men don’t like being judged or criticized for not doing something they “should have known.” There are times when they just “don’t get it.” They want their wives’ expectations spelled out — the more detail, the better. Don’t expect him to read your mind. Be clear and spell out exactly what you want and expect from him. • Be a friend. Men want a safe haven, a best friend where they can unburden themselves and be accepted for who they are. They want to be able to share emotions and know their thoughts and feelings will be kept confidential. Companionship, affection and romance are important. They want a friend who can take their side and is supportive of their struggles. • Take responsibility for your own happiness. Don’t expect your husband to solve all your problems. If you depend on him to make you happy and always do the thoughtful, loving or right thing, you will be disappointed. If you are insecure or unhappy with yourself, you’ll have a tendency to put strong and unrealistic demands on the marriage. Over time, unhealthy dependency breeds hostility and resentment. Ladies, I realize that so many of these points are ones that we want from our husbands also. And they may or may not meet these needs—even though they should. But the purpose for us to share this with you isn’t to point fingers and say, “Me too! I want these things too, so I’ll do my part if my husband will also.” That’s not Biblical (no matter how much we want it to be). It’s to gain a better understanding of our husbands as God would have us. Below are a few Bible proverbs that talks about the importance of gaining understanding: “A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions.” (Proverbs 18:2). “How much better to get wisdom than gold, to choose understanding rather than silver.” (Proverbs 16:16). “Leave your simple ways and you will live; walk in the way of Understanding.” (Proverbs 9:6). “Do not say, "I’ll do to him as he has done to me; I’ll pay that man back for what he did.” (Proverbs 24:29). “Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him yourself.” (Proverbs 26:4). “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.” (Proverbs 24:3-4). “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.” (Proverbs 14:1). We pray this has been helpful! God Bless you! The story is told of Morris, a Russian man, who saved his rubles for
twenty years to buy a new car. After choosing the model and options he wants, he's not the least bit surprised or even concerned to learn that it will take two years for the new car to be delivered. He thanks the salesman and starts to leave, but as he reaches the door he pauses and turns back to the salesman. "Do you know which week two years from now the new car will arrive?" The salesman checks his notes and tells the man that it will be two years to the exact week. The man thanks the salesman and starts out again, but upon reaching the door, he turns back again. "Could you possibly tell me what day of the week two years from now the car will arrive?" The salesman, mildly annoyed, checks his notes again and says that it will be exactly two years from this week, on Thursday. Morris thanks the salesman and once again starts to leave. Halfway though the door, he hesitates, turns back, and walks up to the salesman. "I'm sorry to be so much trouble, but do you know if that will be two years from now on Thursday in the morning, or in the afternoon?" Visibly irritated, the salesman flips through his papers yet another time and says sharply that it will be in the afternoon, two years from now on Thursday. "That's a relief !" says Morris. "The plumber is coming that morning!" We often have to make plans far in advance so as to avoid any conflicts. Before making any commitments - you know the routine - we have to pull out the date book (or the iPhone). "The kids have got a soccer game that night at 7:00, but the next night is free." Planning ahead isn't wrong; in fact, it's a scriptural principle. What makes it wrong, though, is planning ahead without any thought of God. "Come now, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit'; whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. Instead you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.' " (James 4:13-15) Go ahead! Make your plans! Fill in that date book! Just make sure that God hasn't been left out. In Phoenix, Arizona, a 26-year-old mother stared down at her 6 year old son, who was dying of terminal leukaemia. Although her heart was filled with sadness, she also had a strong feeling of determination. Like any parent, she wanted her son to grow up & fulfil all his dreams. Now that was no longer possible. The leukaemia would see to that. But she still wanted her son's dream to come true. She took her son's hand and asked, "Billy, did you ever think about what you wanted to be once you grew up? Did you ever dream and wish what you would do with your life?" Mommy, "I always wanted to be a fireman when I grew up." Mom smiled back and said, "Let's see if we can make your wish come true." Later that day she went to her local fire department in Phoenix, Arizona, where she met Fireman Bob, who had a heart as big as Phoenix. She explained her son's final wish and asked if it might be possible to give her 6 year old son a ride around the block on a fire engine. Fireman Bob said, "Look, we can do better than that. If you'll have your son ready at seven o'clock Wednesday morning, we'll make him an honorary fireman for the whole day. He can come down to the fire station, eat with us, go out on all the fire calls, the whole nine yards! And if you'll give us his sizes, we'll get a real fire uniform for him, with a real fire hat - not a toy -- one-with the emblem of the Phoenix Fire Department on it, a yellow slicker like we wear and rubber boots. They're all manufactured right here in Phoenix, so we can get them fast." Three days later Fireman Bob picked up Billy, dressed him in his uniform and escorted him from his hospital bed to the waiting hook and ladder truck. Billy got to sit on the back of the truck and help steer it back to the fire station. He was in heaven. There were three fire calls in Phoenix that day and Billy got to go out on all three calls. He rode in the different fire engines, the paramedic's van, and even the fire chief's car. He was also videotaped for the local news program. Having his dream come true, with all the Love and attention that was lavished upon him, so deeply touched Billy, that he lived three months longer than any doctor thought possible. One night all of his vital signs began to drop dramatically and the head nurse, who believed in the hospice concept - that no one should die alone, began to call the family members to the hospital. Then she remembered the day Billy had spent as a fireman, so she called the Fire Chief and asked if it would be possible to send a fireman in uniform to the hospital to be with Billy as he made his transition. The chief replied, "We can do better than that. We'll be there in five minutes. Will you please do me a favour? When you hear the sirens screaming and see the lights flashing, will you announce over the PA system, that there is not a fire? It's the department coming to see one of its finest members one more time. And will you open the window to his room? About five minutes later a hook and ladder truck arrived at the hospital and extended its ladder up to Billy's third floor open window - 16 fire-fighters climbed up the ladder into Billy's room. With his mother's permission, they hugged him and held him and told him how much they LOVED him. With his dying breath, Billy looked up at the fire chief and said, "Chief, am I really a fireman now?" "Billy, you are, and the Head Chief, Jesus, is holding your hand," the chief said. With those words, Billy smiled and said, "I know, He's been holding my hand all day, and the angels have been singing.." He closed his eyes one last time. One day a wise teacher was walking through a village. A very angry and rude young man came up and began insulting him. “You have no right teaching others, he shouted.” You are as stupid as everyone else. You are nothing but a fake.”
The man was not upset by these insults. Instead he asked the young man “Tell me, if you buy a gift for someone, and that person does not take it, to whom does the gift belong?” The man was surprised to be asked such a strange question and answered, “It would belong to me, because I bought the gift.” The teacher smiled and said, “That is correct. And it is exactly the same with your anger. If you become angry with me and I do not get insulted, then the anger falls back on you. You are then the only one who becomes unhappy, not me. All you have done is hurt yourself.” “If you want to stop hurting yourself, you must get rid of your anger and become loving instead. When you hate others, you yourself become unhappy. But when you love others, everyone is happy.” The young man listened closely to these wise words. “You are right, “he said. “Please teach me the path of love. I wish to become your follower.” “Of course. I teach anyone who truly wants to learn. Come with me.” The only survivor of a shipwreck washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him, and every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming.
Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect him from the elements, and to store his few possessions. But then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened; everything was lost. He was stung with grief and anger. "God, how could you do this to me!" he cried. Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him. "How did you know I was here?" asked the weary man of his rescuers. "We saw your smoke signal," they replied. Remember next time your little hut is burning to the ground, it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of God. "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28) No word brings greater joy to the heart of a follower of Christ than grace. Grace is the free gift of God to those who have sinned against Him and deserve only His wrath. Grace is that which God gives us to meet His requirements and to face the difficulties of life. The most magnificent display of God’s grace is seen in our salvation. (Ephesians 2:1-9). Take a few moments this week to reflect on how your life has been changed by God’s grace. (Taken from: Seeking Him by Nancy Leigh DeMoss and Tim Grissom). Gracious Father, my heart overflows with thanks as I think about You, how You have saved me and changed my life around. I can only give glory to You. Thank You for saving my soul!
So the king gave the order, and they brought Daniel and threw him into the lion's den. The king said to Daniel, 'May your God, whom you serve continually, rescue you!' (Daniel 6:6)
No question, Daniel got a rough deal. He was set up by jealous, lesser men who wanted him out of the way. It seemed like they succeeded, except for one thing they overlooked: Daniel's trust in God. The interesting thing, however, about Daniel being thrown into the den of lions is that God didn't deliver him out of the den before Daniel found deliverance in it. Imagine if Daniel had fought against being thrown into the den (which he would have been justified in doing) and gone into the den fighting against it every inch of the way, chances are the lions would have torn him to shreds before he hit the bottom. But Daniel didn't. He accepted his lot and trusted his life to God who shut the lion's mouths. On more than one occasion I have asked God that if I am not going to be delivered out of my "lion's den" (naming the frustrating situation I'm in), would he please deliver me in it. Sometimes, like Daniel, God has a lesson for us to learn in our present difficult situation and before he delivers us out of it, like Daniel, we need to find deliverance in it. "But [a] fruit of the spirit is...kindness" Galatians 5:22
Do you know one character trait that is always appreciated? Proverbs 19:22 tells us "What is desirable in a man is kindness." Acts of kindness inspire us, whether it's taking time to help an employee at the office, or defending a person being picked on by bullies. The recipients of these acts of kindness are always grateful. The one person who comes to mind when I think of kindness is Jesus Christ. He shows us that God is kind. And because He is so kind to us, we are to be kind to one another. Especially in a busy world where so many seem to be looking out for number one, acts of kindness are always appreciated. "And afterward they asked for a king; so God gave them Saul the son of Kish, a man of the tribe of Benjamin, for forty years" Acts 13:21 One of my friends said it yesterday. I had heard it before. I have said it before. "You had better be careful what you ask for (in prayer), you might get it." Indeed, that is exactly what happened to Israel. All the other nations had kings. Israel had an old prophet. All the other countries had national leaders. Israel had a high priest. Israel asked the aging prophet for a king. They wanted to be like other nations. They wanted a figure they could look to for protection. They wanted a king. (If you remember, Moses said this time would come. He prophesied that they would want a king. He also said that king would lead them in wrong paths.) So God gave them a king. Saul. He reigned for forty years. He was an imposing figure, head and shoulders taller than his countrymen. He was strong. He was promoted to king of all Israel -- and he was a failure. As time passed, Israel began to see that their king was just a man with all of man's weaknesses. He may have been strong as an ox, but he was as weak as a hollow tree in spirit. He lacked the mental strength to be a powerful leader. He became overwhelmed with his own authority -- his own ambition. And he fell. And he almost took Israel with him. We have all been in Israel's position. We want what we want and we want it now! Not only do we want it, but we demand that God provide it. We don't want to wait for it. We don't want to pay the price for it. We don't want to save for it. We want it -- NOW! And God had better come through because if He doesn't we will do it ourselves. And we pay the price. And that price is much higher than the cost of the thing we want. It is a spiritual price that goes far beyond a few dollars. It saps the soul of strength. It drains the spirit of energy. It taps the resources we have reserved for God's mission, and we suffer for it. We are in pain. We are weakened. Because of our weakness, others begin to suffer with us. We no longer have the spiritual fortitude to help our brother or our sister. Instead we are pulling from them the strength they need for their own battles. A downward spiral has begun. The trail of smoke can be seen for miles around. Doom and defeat seem eminent. But wait. Inside that hulk of a dying body is a pilot -- no, The Pilot. He has not bailed out yet. He has not given up the ship. He is pulling. He is fighting the battle for us. And He has the strength to pull us out of that fatal nosedive we have forced upon ourselves. At the last moment, the flaming hulk of our life is saved and set on a path to recovery. Not because of our strength, but because of the authority of the One who knows how to save the dying. Israel had his David. We have our Jesus. Both are redeemers. David saved a dying nation. Jesus saves a dying soul. Behold, your redemption draws near. Hallelujah, Amen and Amen. |
Ana & Andre Schoonbee God uses us to motivate and encourage the body. Authors
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