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Dear Mosquito

6/3/2015

 
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Healthy Mac

6/3/2015

 
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Teaching

3/20/2015

 
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Bar joke

3/6/2015

 
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Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm .  He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV...

The 10 pm news was coming on.  The news crew was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"

Bob said, "You know, I bet he'll jump."

The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"

 Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob, saying, "Fair's fair.  Here's your money."

Bob replied, "I can't take your money.  I saw this earlier on the 5 pm news, and so I knew he would jump."

The blonde replied, "I did too, but didn't think he'd do it again."

Bob took the money...

killer cat

3/6/2015

 
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Round tuit

3/5/2015

 
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Discipline

3/5/2015

 
Good Argument 

Most people think it improper to smack children, so I have tried other methods to control my children when they have one of 'those moments.' 

One that I found effective is for me to just take the child for a car ride and talk.
 

Some say it's the vibration from the car, others say it's the time away from any distractions such as TV, Video Games, Computer, IPod, etc. 

Either way, my children usually calm down and stop misbehaving after our car ride together.  Eye to eye contact helps a lot too.. 

I've included a photo below of one of my sessions with my son, in case you would like to use the technique. 

Sincerely,
 
Your Friend
...

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A LITTLE BIBLICAL HUMOR

2/4/2015

 
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I
  Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?
    A. Ruthless.

  Q. What do they call pastors in Germany ?

A. German Shepherds.

  Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
    A. Noah He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

  Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
    A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.

  Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
    A. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the  apostles were all in one Accord.

  Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
      A. Samson. He brought the house down.

  Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
      A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

  Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
    A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

  Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
    A. The area around the Jordan river, the banks were always overflowing.

  Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
    A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

  Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
    A. Joshua, son of Nun.

  Q. Why didn't they play cards on the Ark?
    A. Because Noah was standing on the deck.  

  PS. Did you know it's a sin for a woman to make coffee?
      Yup, it's in the Bible. It says . . . "He-brews"

Pot holes

1/30/2015

 
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Fish

1/30/2015

 
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    Ana & Andre Schoonbee

     God uses us to motivate and encourage the body.

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