“Save me from the insults I fear ... I want to obey Your commands ... Show me how much you love me, Lord, and save me according to your promise. Then I can answer those who insult me.” Psalm 119:39-42
The fear of rejection comes from all directions: your marriage, your family, your parents, at school, at work, from former friends, from disappointments, from criticisms, from a look. Have you ever seen a look kill somebody? Have you ever seen a parent manipulate a kid with an eyebrow?
That’s the fear of rejection! And it can hinder your life in many ways.
The fear of rejection prevents us from giving and receiving love. Past hurts prevent future relationships. A guy says, “I got burned on a hot stove. I’ll never touch it again!” People say that about relationships: “I got burned in a marriage. I’ll never get married again!” The problem is, people are not stoves. They change.
Your fear of rejection is based and rooted in two things. One is the idea that we all need to be loved. That's a fact. We do. We all desperately need massive doses of love in our lives to be healthy individuals.
God says, “I want to love you.” God is love. You need to be loved. That is a deep profound need that you have. But what causes the fear of rejection is the false idea that we think that other people ought to be able to fully meet that need in our lives. When you expect somebody else to meet all your need for love, you're asking for trouble. You're setting yourself up for hurt. You're setting yourself up for rejection.
You have to put God in first place, because he's the only one who can ultimately meet all your needs.
Does God ever use other people? Sure. Does God ever love us through other people? Of course. Does God want us to love others? Yes. Does he want to use us as channels of love? Absolutely.
But, you will never have all your needs met by any person or group of people. God never meant it to be that way. They just don't have enough love. Human love is limited. God's love is unlimited, unconditional. No matter how deep your need is, he can fill it. And he never runs dry.